Mama Tay Is A Machine!

Day Two of "Desiree Goes Unplugged(ish)."

As I began to understand just how BIG this blogging world is I started to "jump" around from blog to blog. It's amazing some of the stories and women I've found and been following.

Taylor is one of those bloggers who amazes me everyday. The women is an inspiration. She's on an amazing healthy journey, losing weight and making serious changes in her diet. On days when I don't feel like getting my run in I pull up Taylor's blog. She's my motivation and inspiration more than she'll ever know. AND, she's becoming a runner. Keep reading to find out what she signed up to participate in this fall... Ahhhh, so excited for her!!! :)

Hello Everyone, Ms. Desiree is taking a vacation this week and I volunteered to write a guest post for her.  When I volunteered for her, I asked her what she wanted me to write about and she said that I should write about my weight loss journey so far.  So here we go.  

Starting way back in high school, my weight was never an issue for me.  I was athletic, I played volleyball, tennis, and cheered for the three seasons during school and in the summers I swam and played tennis.  I never really gave my weight any thought, I mean of course we are all hard on ourselves as teenage girls, but I never "dieted" or anything like that.  My mom always provided healthy snacks for my brother and sister and I growing up, and I could blame her for my weight gain, but that would put the blame on someone else.  

The truth is, when I went to college, my eating fell apart.  I had no idea how to eat on my own, how to grocery shop, how to deal with the dorm fatty food, late night french fries...etc...So I put on the pounds.  If we are talking about weight numbers, I don't really know what I weighed in high school - I can only estimate that it was around 120-130.  I remember being weighed in the spring of my freshman year and it was already up to 140s...and the weight kept piling on.  I was not working out; I was not being athletic and was leading the typical college life.  

All throughout my twenties, the weight gained continued.  

I lost about 30 pounds in 2007 from running.  I have given a lot of thought to why I couldn't stick to it.  Of course we all have fear that we will slip into old patterns of not being able to stick to our current weight loss.  The reason I didn't stick to it that time were more basic than I realized.  I didn't change my diet at the time, I just ate lean cuisines and other typical "diet food" - I didn't examine the other parts of my life that were causing the weight gain as well, such as being a toxic relationship that lasted from 18 to 26, having zero future plans or goals, and sure I was running 2 miles every single day - but I had no challenge - I had no goals.  I had no goals anywhere in my life at that time.

Wow, I just wrote that and it's true.

I had no future plans or goals; I was running in place, never getting anywhere.  OK, so I ended up putting on the weight I had lost and then some.  In June of 2008, I broke up with the deadbeat and attempted to get my life together...it was quite difficult, I was a mess...I lost my job in December and by January I was a complete disaster...overweight and unhappy and living with my mom...yikes...so I got a job waiting tables and from the constant running of waiting tables, my weight got down to 165 and that's the weight I was when I met my husband, the love of my life.  I met him while waiting tables and my life has been forever changed.  I ended up putting on weight due to the little bean in my belly and I hadn't lost any weight since I was 165. I initially put on love weight and when I first weighed in for my first prenatal appointment I was around 170ish...I put on 40 lbs with my little bean and tipped the scales at 210ish...I lost some of that weight with her birth and the newborn/non-sleeping situation, but over the years...she is 3 now...I gained almost all that back...

I have given some thought to why?  Why did I let myself get to that point, why did I gain all that weight when I was happily married and sure we had stresses, but I was generally happy.  Then...I realized that I wasn't happy with myself.  How do you change that...what do you do to find your inner happiness?  I had to start finding out how to find my inner happy.  Sounds so dumb, but so true.  I needed to have future goals - I applied to graduate school and just finished my first semester with straight A's....I also asked for a raise at my job...and the final thing that really sealed the deal for me was I needed to trust my husband...I needed to trust that he loved me no matter what size I was and that he would be there for me when I'm the diet bitch from hell :) But the most important thing?  I needed to trust myself that I will do this and I won't fail.  I needed to trust that I am worth it in this little life and my health and my happiness are the most important thing in my life.  

How did I get to this point?  

Well, it all came down to a picture that was taken on Christmas Eve, 2012.  This past Christmas.  Here is the picture:

I was appalled...I could not believe that that was me... so on December 29, 2012 - I started WW - I don't know if you know this but WW usually runs a deal at the end of December where you can get 3 months for the price of one...so that's what I did.  I used WW from December to March and in March I switched over to My Fitness Pal.  Was it hard at first? Yes, very.  I was the Diet Bitch from Hell that was hungry and wanted FOOOOOOOD...and I was still second guessing myself in terms of exercise.  I was scared to run.  I knew it would suck and be so hard and I was scared.  I read over my blog and realize that I wasn't really in the game until the very end of January...maybe even February. 

But I am in the game now.  I have currently lost 44 pounds - I started at 208 and am now down to 164.  I am skinnier than I was when I met my main man, but I have a long way to go.  My goal is somewhere between 120-130ish...and I don't really know what my end weight will be, I just know I'm not there yet - my initial goal was to lost 80lbs, and that's still a very realistic goal for me - oh I am 5'5" and 3/4s in case you're wondering :) 

So, why is this time different?  All I can say is that it's like a light switch has been flipped.  I've never been more focused in my life.  I control the food cravings and urges through food prep.  On Sundays I prep food for the week.  I usually make Hard Boiled Eggs, two proteins, wash and chop veggies, and some sort of protein bar...whether that's no bake energy balls or pumpkin/applesauce muffins...I'm not sure and this week I'm toying with the idea of not making anything protein bar-ish at all because Ive been drinking protein shakes in the morning instead...I don't know - it's always evolving and changing, but it's the key, in my opinion.  Being able to grab two turkey meatballs and some veggies for lunch in the mornings is so essential to me.  And reheating some turkey taco meat for a salad at night makes it easy for me as well as my baby girl.  

In terms of working out, I’ve sort of turned into a runner :) I'm up to 3 miles!  I can’t even believe that as I type it :) I am on the last week of Hal Higdon's Novice 5K program and on the week of June 3rd, I am starting the last 5 weeks of his Novice 10K program, so that I can start his Half-Marathon training program on July 8th so that I can run my first half on September 28th!! Me, running a half marathon, crazy sauce :)  And yesterday - I started Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred.  I needed to incorporate some strength training and have no idea where to start, so I figured this was a good place to start :) The best part about this new active life?  My daughter.  She sees me running and loves it :) She calls her sneakers running shoes and yesterday she did the shred with me - obviously I didn't let her use my weights or anything and she mostly bounced around, but the point is, she saw me doing it and participated :) I loved it:

Yesterday doing the 30 Day Shred :)

So, am I scared I'm going to fail?  Of course?  But, am I motivated and determined?  Absolutely - I think a good healthy dose of fear is a good thing, it's when it turns into self-doubt that you have a problem.  And I try to remind myself that your whole life can change in the next 30 seconds...all you have to do is try.  So what, you just ate 10 snickers balls...it doesn't mean the rest of the day is a crap shoot...keep going and keep trying...one of my favorite sayings goes something like...one bad meal isn't going to ruin your diet just like one healthy meal wont make you lose 50 pounds :) I just try to take a deep breath and keep on trucking :) 

Here are some recent pics Ive taken of Before and Afters:

The left picture was June 2010 and the right picture was Mother's Day weekend - May 11, 2013.

The tops picture were January 2013 and the bottom pics are the beginning of May 2013.

And this one is my favorite - the top left picture was September 28, 2012 and the right pic was the past Friday, May 17, 2013 - and this coming September 28, 2013 - I will be running my first Half Marathon :)
The bottom pics just show how I am getting faster at my 2 miler :) I am picking one day a week to run at a faster pace... it help with the long run paces :)

OK, thanks Desiree for letting me share my story!!